blown a seal help HELP!!!

[sledrat]

Once there was an Eskimo who had a snowmobile. He LOVED his snowmobile and rode it everywhere he went. One day his snowmobile wouldn’t start. He took it to the snowmobile repair shop and told the repairman of his problem. The repairman began to look for the problem. As he was looking at the engine, he said to the Eskimo, “Oh, it looks like you’ve blown a seal.” The Eskimo, wiping his mouth nervously, replied, “Oh, no, that’s just snow…”

[moosemeat]

Haaaaa!

Heres one for ya






These three rednecks, Jim, Billy-Bob and Percy, are out fishing, and of course have the requisite three flats of beer and are well into them.

Jim hooks a big ole fish and Percy gets the net out and is trying his drunken best to get it in the boat. In order to reach, he heaves his beer belly over the side and promptly falls in.

He can’t swim, and stuggles desperately as Jim and Billy-Bob watch. Jim slaps Billy-Bob on the arm and says. “You better go get im.”

“Me? He’s your cousin, you go get im.”

“Me? He’s your brother-in-law, you go get im!”

“You.” “No you”, and so they argue and Percy goes down. They sit there drinking beer and arguing until they have finished ALL the beer and then decide that since they cannot settle the argument that they will both go.

Down in the murky waters, they grab hold of the body, haul it to the surface and manage, with much difficulty to through it over the side into the boat and then haul themselves aboard as well.

They’re sitting there, huffing and puffing and Billy-Bob slaps Jim in the arm and says, “Well don’t jest set there, ya need ta give im thet mouth to mouth recessitation.”

So Jim gets down there and starts to give mouth to mouth immediately backing away hacking and puking, “Damn, thet Percy, he’s got bad breath!”

“Yeah, an where in hell’d he git thet there ski-doo suit and thet helmet?”